So I met myself a South African man…

My new friends here have had some hard last few weeks so they made plans to go to dinner and dancing and because I am new here, I got invited.

The dinner place we went was fantastic even though we were too late to get their full menu.  This place would be perfect for a prom.  The upper floors are filled with tables, the bottom floor is lined with booths and there is this gigantic floor that could be used for dancing that is now just filled with settees, couches, and chairs for lounging.  It was a lovely place with at least 30 Picasso style giant murals and then these beautiful Victorian chandeliers. 

Before my real story let me tell you one funny thing you might not realize, there are a lot of coed bathrooms here or at least the places I seem to keep going.  They have separate stalls but you still enter and exit and wash your hands in the same place.  So at this restaurant I went to go to the bathrom and realized quickly that it was coed.  Still a little taken aback because this is brand new for me outside of Ally McBeal I went into the first stall.  Inside was an abstract piece of artwork depicting a nude man.  I thought that might be a signal that even though it was a a coed restroom certain stalls might be for only male or female.  So I checked another stall until I found one with a nude woman abstract painting!  When I told my friends out in the main room they laughed and laughed and laughed.

Then we went dancing.  And if you know me you might already be aware that I am not the star of any dance party.  I am more of the contemporary dance style in my own bedroom or bathroom with the doors locked and my choice of music blaring.  (So if you ever want to see me break out in my attempt at Riverdance just pop the Last of the Mohicans soundtrack in the player and turn it up high!)

So after about an hour of dancing I started getting bored.  And I decided that if I was going to be there for a few more hours I was going to make the most I could out of it and get a good workout in for the night.  So I made sure to move every limb as much as the other which led to some very interesting dancing that reminded me a bit of CK’s dancing <–yeah, I said it.

We found ourselves a nice little corner to dance in where we could safely store our coats and purses.  I ended up being the one to stay in the corner and watch the stuff while getting my dance/workout on and I thought of Anna’s sweet Dancing with the Stars moves from February if that says anything!  We all noticed this one guy who just kept hovering around us the entire night.  He seemed completely alone and looked like a short Steve Urkel dressed like he ready to go either fishing or on a safari.

Finally he made his move.  He told me he’d been watching me dance all night and thought that I had wildly different but wonderful moves.  He told me that no one else in the whole world would like my moves, no other guy, only him.  He also noted that I was different, not like the rest of my friends who were with me.

He wanted my number and to know where I lived and where I came from but I didn’t tell or give him anything.  But he insisted I take his number.  He told me I had only to call and he would take me on a tour around the city even into the places that are known for being unsafe because he could protect me.  And he offerred to teach me Venda, his native language. 

I just kept saying okay, thank you, anything to get him to stop and to get back with my friends.  Finally he went the distance and said, “I love your dancing, you are just so different.  Actually, I love you.  You understand what I mean.”

This was the clincher of the deal.  Zaaiboo and I are getting married in two weeks and you’re all invited.

Wait are you serious?!  Yes, about everything until those last two sentences written in italics. 

So I met a guy and he fell in love with me and my crazy workout dance moves and my differences from my friends.  And then I left only with my friends and his number which I will not call.  Sweet.  Next?