Unplugging, yet Recharging…
I’m going to tell you honestly, I am getting and not-getting exactly what I expected out of this Africa experience.
Some moments have been fantastic, Kenya was certainly a high. I felt fully satisfied and at peace and at ease and where I needed to be, doing what I needed to do. But other days, evenings and weekends really, have been close to awful with loneliness.
I have been invited to one other person’s house, besides my small bible study group’s. And I kind of made that invitation happen.
So here I am experiencing what I tried to explain to CK one terrible night months ago. He didn’t get it at all, didn’t even really want to hear it.
It’s the worst I imagined I’d experience, except I’m not experiencing it in Cape Town and I don’t have a bike. (So goes imagining best and worsts, you can never get every detail right.)
Don’t get me wrong, work is fine-I have 40 full hours a week and then I go to church Sunday mornings and small group Thursday nights-but nothing much happens the rest of my approximately 82 hours. I see movies every now and then, I look for free local events, I cook/bake lots and lots of food, and I watch tv all the time.
And I am at this point of loneliness/silence where there has to be change. But I can’t just fill my times with only service, volunteering, hanging out with co-workers kids (which I did last night to my delight: talk about building forts, making giant brownie sundaes, and eating homemade pizza!).
I can’t just busy myself with others and stuff me and God out of it. I did something similar to that during my junior year of college and it didn’t end too well.
So I find I have to use the silence/alone time/rest to grow. Grow in God, grow in myself, grow in service.
All that being said, I have unplugged the tv for one week.
I only have one unread book in the house, more will be gathered. I will get out more. I will read my bible more. I will talk to God, I mean really really talk-not just think good thoughts up towards his direction. I will call Pastor Willie. I will cook/bake for someone. I will go to a farmer’s market this weekend. I will delve into what this free time means.
I will listen to good music. I may still go see/rent a movie-but I won’t put the television on just for sound or entertainment only for one week.
I might draw pictures. I might write poetry. I might send you an e-mail or a letter or a postcard. I will mail my sister’s birthday present.
And if you would like, I will tell/ask/share some of the things I have already been challenged with in the Bible recently. I would love people to share with/to break it down with/to delve into-if you’re interested-comment back at me!
Ask me how it goes as the week goes on, I haven’t gone this long without tv since…I don’t even know. Maybe never? 7 days. I’m in. You?